Wednesday, August 6, 2014

How to Survive the "Mommy Wars"

#1: Don't participate in them. Don't read the infuriating articles, don't get angry at someone else's post, just pass right on by them. When someone starts a conversation about how bad another Mom is, start talking about cupcakes, The Declaration of Independence, or how you had a bad haircut in 7th grade.

#2. Understand that just because another Mom thinks what you're doing makes you a bad mom, doesn't actually make you a bad mom, or turn you into a bad mom. My 3 year old will be all upset at her sisters and come up to me crying, "She called me a baby, but I'm not a baby!"
I'll ask her, "Are you a baby?"
I'll ask again, "Does her calling you a baby turn you into a baby?"
"Then what are you so upset about?"
Roll your eyes and move on.

#3. Realize that when you think you are being judged, it might be all in your head. Let me give you an example.
You and I go to the park with our 3 year olds. After an hour of playing, my daughter comes up and asks me for a drink. I pull out a box of good old Mott's apple juice. Your child looks thirsty, too, so I ask you, "does he want one, too?" You say "no, thank you." Then I say, "Oh, really, I brought extra, it's not problem." You then very nicely say, "He's actually not allowed." Or maybe you say, "Sorry, we only drink organic." I most likely will automatically feel judged, or think that you think you're a better mom than me, but you don't actually feel this way. Just because another Mom does something differently than you, doesn't mean she thinks the way you are doing it is wrong. It's just different.

You will enjoy Motherhood, being around other Moms, and just have less anger and stress if you follow these tips, promise!